Touch Me Not

This is not about the plant…although it could be…in some alternative universe.

A few weeks ago, while leaving the club (had to be right!?), a man grabbed a lady’s hand while trying to talk to her. She pulled her hand away and simply said, “Don’t touch me,” as she walked away.The man appeared puzzled and shouted that he just wanted to wish her a good night. “Don’t touch me though. I don’t like people touching me,” she said while glancing back.

The scene was all too familiar to me, as I have seen it many times before, unfortunately. I have also had the displeasure of going through such experiences. Why do some men feel the need to grab a woman’s hand so that they can talk to her? Is it really necessary? Do you think that grabbing my hand will make me suddenly want to stand there and have a conversation with you? I really have tried and failed to understand this move. Personally, when someone grabs my hand, I immediately get alarmed. That feeling heightens when the face attached to the hand is that of a stranger, which is typically the case. I always pull my hand away, yes in a this-hand-belongs-to-me type of way, and then walk off. On days when I am in a generous mood I typically say, “Don’t touch me,” accompanied with an eye-roll. Yes, eye-roll, because it is very annoying to be minding your own business and then someone decides to grab your hand all in the name of wanting to talk to you.

Seriously, if you want to talk to someone do just that. If they respond, good for you. If they don’t, then good for you too…it’s not the end of the world. Grabbing someone’s hand shows that you think they should/have to respond to you, and if they don’t realize that, then holding them hostage will make them respond. Really, men…you have the right to speak but you do not have the right to my response and I have the right to not speak/respond.

I have never seen a man doing this to another man though. “Hey sir”…grabs hand…”Can I talk to you for a minute?” Yurp, I am yet to see this happen. Why? Probably because you might get knocked in the eye for grabbing a stranger’s hand. So why do it to women? Just STOP! If you think we owe you a conversation (or anything really), you have another think coming. While we are at it, you might as well wipe that shocked/ surprised/ did-you-just-brush-off-my-advances?/ how-dare-you-reject-me-in-all-my-glory? look off your face.

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